Why do people work on relationships which have always been fragile since the outset? I mean, life is a hell of a long time to be placing sticking plasters over an open wound.
None of us has to accept a compromise which ever makes us unhappy. If we are truly in love then the compromise and change will be on both sides and will be virtually unnoticed by those concerned.
I love my Deej, he’s mad but I knew from the first day I met him that it would be years, not months.
Some people just should not be together, it is not them both compromising, it is them both arguing all the time. They don’t see what is going right, they are too busy sorting what is wrong. In those cases I’d argue, it’s not the person they value but the idea of a relationship.
Seriously, if at least once every day you don’t think how lucky you are to be with this person, don’t bother! If, when you think of getting old or moving to a new town you don’t automatically think of them being with you, it’s not working!
Of course, some people, even if they don’t realise it, are so right for each other. On their own they struggle but, with that other person, they work.
sadly, some people don’t realise what they have until they have thrown it all away. Hell, gay people are a nightmare for always thinking the grass may be better elsewhere and, maybe this guy isn’t the ‘one’ and maybe they should just try out other options before they commit. Straight people too are not much better. Too many want to run before they can walk in their relationships. Start having babies before they have any thought about a future, want to ‘get a place’ without the first clue what that may mean, without thinking first not what they ‘want’ to do but what they ‘need’ to do. Just because something is difficult at the start, isn’t just the perfect situation they ‘want’ does not mean it isn’t working. There is always time for things to change when it comes to where they work, where they live etc. If their relationship is working, if they are in love and happy, what difference does a year or a few years of ‘making do’ make? That is, after all, part of the exploration of life isn’t it? Learning how to ‘make do’ together?
I feel so terribly sorry for those who sadly grabbed for what they wanted and lost what they had.