“Neither a borrower nor a lender be; for loan doth oft lose both itself and friend, and borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.” Hamlet. … In this line from Hamlet, Polonius gives his son Laertes advice on managing money. He starts off by telling him never to lend or borrow money from friends.

It is very good advice as I have found, to my cost, over the years.

I have lost friends who I loaned money they didn’t repay, sometimes £100’s and, in one case £1000’s.

Being owed money which doesn’t get repaid sucks big time

Do you know, if all the money I was owed were repaid tomorrow (just what I can remember) I would be nearly £10,000 better off, that’s amazing isn’t it?

Of course, I do lend money which gets repaid but, somehow I still get stressed as I rarely seem to know my financial worth.

Just now, a friend who hit rough times borrowed £350 from me. I actually paid him £250 for work he did on the basis that he was actually just doing me a favour. I did him a very similar favour in the same period but, he suddenly expected paying so I paid him. A few weeks later he used the money I loaned him to pay bills and groceries as a down payment on a new car. Same guy reads but doesn’t respond to messages, effectively, in modern terms, I have been ghosted, I no longer exist to him.

I am a victim of Gypsy scammers too. I engaged them to do a job for me, they took me for a few £1000. I took them to court, I won, they have a county court judgement against them but, of course, I will never see my money again.

Covid too has cost me. I now have solicitors fighting my case to get over £1300 back from Philippines Airlines who have owed me this money for the best part of a year now. I doubt I will see that again either.

I borrowed money myself, from a bank and credit card. I owe more than I can ever repay. Not all on luxuries, it started with a person who took me for another 4 figure sum. Then it was all the legal government theft to get the visas for Dennis, that cost me way over £10k so far, the money had to come from somewhere.

I’ve not had any proper break away for years and my health is in decline and I am stressing I don’t yet have enough to pay for next years round of visas, I’ll need over £4000 for those and then, finally, Dennis will be a joint UK/Philippines citizen and … I’ll be broke.