Last night, as I often do …

I prayed. I asked, show me the way, what to do because I feel helpless in how to do the right thing for Josh, for Daisy, Sean and Javis. In the morning I thought something I thought unthinkable last night … suggest Daisy and Sean sit down with Javis as adults, concede they may have been hasty on Weds and see what happens.

In my mind I expected Javis to graciously accept their apology, acknowledge he was wrong, stop blaming me for everything and agree to finally put right all the lies he has told about us since 2009. I am not sure how that would have answered my prayer but it seemed the right thing to do.

What happened did answer my prayer. He was rude and dismissive. He refused to apologise for anything or so much as agree he could be wrong. He won’t undo the lies he has done, he just added more lies to the list and he insulted me.

Finally, after all this time, I see the light. There is nothing I can do for Javis, he is beyond hope. What I can do is protect my grandson as much as possible by having no further involvement with Javis. You all know what Javis is like, hell, you were telling me and I was arguing back it would all be OK and, you were right. He can do nothing but harm Josh in the long term with his lies and poison about us. H has no regrets about it which means he is all but certain to try and tell Josh the same lies about us. That’s going to totally screw Josh’s mind. Josh knows all of us, he loves us & Javis’s lies and the way he tells just about anyone are going to harm him, he needs protecting from him.

Whilst I don’t have any say in the decision making process, I so hope this goes to court and soon. At least if Josh only has to see him at a contact centre he will be safe, they will monitor what Javis says and won’t tolerate his lies.

Javis is out of my life. All the good memories he has now killed off by denying them. I will never speak of his disrespectfully to Josh but then, I just won’t speak of him other than to confirm he exists. Javis may be Javis’s biological son but, Javis has never even tried to be his dad. Sean is all the dad Josh will ever need. Let’s just hope the law sees Javis for what he is and does the right thing by Josh.

I love my family, all of them. I so hope no one ever tried to disrupt it as Javis has done.

The power of prayer has proved powerful to me over the years. I don’t make a song and dance about it, I just know. Now, if the almighty can do the same for those who have been fed the lies and help them see the truth, I’d greatly appreciate it.

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