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Yesterday, myself and a mate decided to go for a walk, not a simple stroll to the pub but nearly 16 miles along the canal from Northampton to Castlethorpe near MK. Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time but somehow, now doesn’t seem to clever.

It was a lovely evening. It is such a shame that my sex drive is dead else I may have liked to have thought that the offer from Tom to ‘help out’ was geuine and that it was worth taking him up on the offer!

This morning was just hell.

It was Daisy’s turn to sort Jermaine out with medication but he wasn’t having any of it. He tried to punch her in the face but fortunately missed. I took over, tried and failed to give him his insulin which he must have before meals. He started swearing at me.

He then left the kitchen and stood in the hallway. I headed off toward the stairs a short while later, I think I was aiming to find his shoes which may have been upstairs, I forget now. Anyway, I turned my back on Jermaine just for a second and he went for me. He dug his nails in good and proper and punched me in the face; my glasses went flying as they often do. There was quite a bit of blood and I am still sore and shaky several hours later but this is not unusual.

Both Matt and myself got totally angry with him and both of us retaliated which did seem to calm him down. Within 20 minutes he was quite happy to get on his school bus.

I don’t know which is worse, the fact that he is violent or that he doesn’t seem to give a shit. I am sure his level of understanding is such that he can know right from wrong like that but he chooses to do this.

At least things are still happening with meetings, a few are planned for within the month so maybe some progress could be made.

This morning was just hell.

It was Daisy’s turn to sort Jermaine out with medication but he wasn’t having any of it. He tried to punch her in the face but fortunately missed. I took over, tried and failed to give him his insulin which he must have before meals. He started swearing at me.

He then left the kitchen and stood in the hallway. I headed off toward the stairs a short while later, I think I was aiming to find his shoes which may have been upstairs, I forget now. Anyway, I turned my back on Jermaine just for a second and he went for me. He dug his nails in good and proper and punched me in the face; my glasses went flying as they often do. There was quite a bit of blood and I am still sore and shaky several hours later but this is not unusual.

Both Matt and myself got totally angry with him and both of us retaliated which did seem to calm him down. Within 20 minutes he was quite happy to get on his school bus.

I don’t know which is worse, the fact that he is violent or that he doesn’t seem to give a shit. I am sure his level of understanding is such that he can know right from wrong like that but he chooses to do this.

At least things are still happening with meetings, a few are planned for within the month so maybe some progress could be made.

What an awful weekend Jermaine created and he has carried it on into the week as well.

When he is not acting like a Zombie (for acting I think it is) he is refusing to eat which buggers up his diabetes management. When he is not doing that he is thumping, it really is most unpleasant.

All kids are winding each other up and or being dead lazy. I have had words with them this evening trying to explain with the huge extended period of having Jermaine here so often we are all uptight and we have two choices, either let the tension get to us and fight each other or to close ranks and stand up for our family.

I doubt this will do any good, they really only hear what they want to and ignore the rest. I am quite sure I shall again have to wake Zoey up tomorrow, Matt won’t chase up getting a job so he can repay me what he owes and DJ will carry on the now favourite family pastime of point scoring.