Category: Uncategorized

What an awful weekend Jermaine created and he has carried it on into the week as well.

When he is not acting like a Zombie (for acting I think it is) he is refusing to eat which buggers up his diabetes management. When he is not doing that he is thumping, it really is most unpleasant.

All kids are winding each other up and or being dead lazy. I have had words with them this evening trying to explain with the huge extended period of having Jermaine here so often we are all uptight and we have two choices, either let the tension get to us and fight each other or to close ranks and stand up for our family.

I doubt this will do any good, they really only hear what they want to and ignore the rest. I am quite sure I shall again have to wake Zoey up tomorrow, Matt won’t chase up getting a job so he can repay me what he owes and DJ will carry on the now favourite family pastime of point scoring.

In the morning, waking to the new day, the sun, the cool breeze, the birds, is that it?

Music that makes our spirit soar, the book that makes our eyes swell with tears, is that it?

Comforting a child when they are in pain, wishing for that pain to be mine, is that it?

That rush of feeling when our hand is touched, our cheek softly stroked, is that it?

You look nice, have you done your hair different? Is that it?

Happy birthday, I just thought I’d call, didn’t want to miss the day, is that it?

Dad, I drew this picture for you, it’s not very good, I hope you like it, is that it?

Why did he leave me, 30 years together, why now? You don’t need to see your mum crying, sorry. Is that it?

It’s not right, our children shouldn’t go first, it’s not right. Is that it?

Yes, yes it all is, love is all around us in the happy and the sad, is that it? Yes, that’s love.

(c) Steve Williams 2005

In the morning, waking to the new day, the sun, the cool breeze, the birds, is that it?

Music that makes our spirit soar, the book that makes our eyes swell with tears, is that it?

Comforting a child when they are in pain, wishing for that pain to be mine, is that it?

That rush of feeling when our hand is touched, our cheek softly stroked, is that it?

You look nice, have you done your hair different? Is that it?

Happy birthday, I just thought I’d call, didn’t want to miss the day, is that it?

Dad, I drew this picture for you, it’s not very good, I hope you like it, is that it?

Why did he leave me, 30 years together, why now? You don’t need to see your mum crying, sorry. Is that it?

It’s not right, our children shouldn’t go first, it’s not right. Is that it?

Yes, yes it all is, love is all around us in the happy and the sad, is that it? Yes, that’s love.

(c) Steve Williams 2005

On going through the all new outeverywhere (total crap and should be deleted) I decided to look at my linked friends and was amazed to see that one of my longest standing linked friends has made no comment about me at all in his ‘Me on him’ section. I am, in fact, one of the very few to which this is the case yet I thought we were rather close. To the world it would look like I am just someone he happens to know and I found that quite upsetting. I know it is just a silly internet site but all the same, it a public face to this person and who he considers to be a friend and why and I, as it appears, am not one of them. It’s one of those, I feel used moments. 🙁

Went with Robin to see a play last night in Eydon and it was really rather good, not perfect but then, it was the opening night. I laughed and that has to be the point, perfection is for another place, another time.

I have spent this morning catching up on some paperwork and am feeling terribly guilty for wasting around an hour of that time since 9am eating lunch and surfing the web, am I mad or something?

The weekend holds the prosect of boredom and I feel deep depression time coming on yet can do very little about it. Right now, the best I can do is get out and finish the tasks I started today.